Matlock Town FC

[Mark Doxey Wo-oh]

A huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender can't help but stare at the guy because in contrast to his
large muscles,
the man has a head that is the size of an orange.

The bartender hands the guy his beer and says, "You know, I'm not gay but
I want to
compliment you on your physique, it really is phenomenal! But I have a
question, why is
your head so small?"

The big guy nods slowly. He's obviously fielded this question many times.
"One day," he
begins, "I was hunting and got lost in the woods. I heard someone
crying for help. I
followed the cries and they led me to a frog that was sitting next to a
stream."

"No shit?" says the bartender, thoroughly intrigued.

"Yeah, so I picked up the frog and it said, Kiss me. Kiss me and I will
turn into a genie
and grant you three wishes."

"Keep going!"

I looked around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog a kiss. POOF!
The frog turned
into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman.

She said, "You now have three wishes."

I looked down at my scrawny 115 pound body and said, "I want a body like
Arnold
Schwarzenneger."

She nodded, snapped her fingers, and POOF there I was, so huge that I
ripped out of my
clothes and was standing there naked!

She then asked, "What will be your second wish?"

"What next?" begged the bartender.

I looked hungrily at her beautiful body and replied, "I want to make
sensuous love with
you here by this stream." She nodded, laid down, and beckoned to me. We
made love right
there by that stream for hours!

Afterwards, as we lay there next to each other, sweating from our
glorious lovemaking,
she whispered into my ear, "You know, you do have one more wish. What will
it be?"

I looked at her and replied, "How 'bout a little head?"
_________________
It's not a bald patch, it's a solar panel for a sex machine. (It's just unfortunate that Matlock's always so cloudy!)